I visit my friend in the picture above several times throughout the day, but mostly in the morning. I’m not kidding when I say that sometimes I find myself excited at the prospect of waking up, going downstairs in the dark, turning on a little lamp in the kitchen and starting the ritual of making my first cup of the day.

The first cup is always the best of course, that’s the one that really wakes me up. The subsequent cups simply allow me to get more and more wired until Robert thinks I’m just walking around the house creating mischief. “What’s got into you? Why are you being so……so……NAUGHTY? How many cups of coffee have you had???”

I’ve been spending time with the twins lately and can’t believe that they are soon to be celebrating their first birthday. Watching their little personalities reveal themselves and seeing glimpses of thier parents in little glances and mannerisms.

Robert and I believe that our house is ready for children. We first started to REALLY believe this when the house would suddenly become awfully quiet after the girls had left. We would wave them off at the door as my sister and brother - in - law would drive them home and Robert and I found ourselves walking slowly back to the room where only a few moments ago there had been so much new life.

“It’s just so quiet when they leave” I would say, staring at the place on the floor where their blanket had been.

“I know, I don’t like it ” Robert would add as he would notice a tiny sock that had been left behind.

I have heard it said that there is never a perfect or convenient time to have a child. But who on earth wants to have a family for the convenience of it all? When I think of mothers who still, to this day, toil fields with children strapped to their backs, I laugh at the absurdity of some of my worries.

I know that all mothers will understand it when I say that even though sleep deprivation is madness making it all gets forgotten when a child hands you a toy in order to share playtime with you. I find this miraculous and I’m only experiencing it through my nieces. A good thing and something I would not have grasped had I started a family a lot earlier in life.

And so this journey has already begun. A journey in search of life. New life.

I should have known that it was on it’s way when I preffered to feed one of the girls when I really should have been getting into my wedding dress. Would Robert have forgiven me for being late with an excuse such as that?

“You were late because you wanted to give Truly a bottle?” he would have asked…

“Yes, hon” I would have replied

“Well they do have to be fed, angel. I only wish I could have helped”

It’s safe to say we’re ready.